Still (Not So) Unsure

I was actually coming to type a post called "Don't Even Bother" and just direct you to my Tumblr with no inhibition or regard to this blog. But I'm suddenly apprehensive. Like, what if I want to write something OD? I'm also a hoarder. This is probably me fighting to not let go. This blog will forever remain. It's a testament to my college career.

However, my progress and further trials are/will be shown on my tumblr account. I've posted poems. And pictures. Quotes, of course. And semi- lengthy text. It's not what you're used to. But it's what works for me, as of late. I can post updates from my phone, which gives me a lot more freedom then this blog has. Free will is just that. You have the right to choose.

I'll be here.

Won't You Join Me?

B

Not Quite Neglected

I'm here today.

Gone tomorrow.

I know.

Look on the bright side though.

I have not completely forsaken you.

I'm pseudo-blogging elsewhere... as of yesterday.

See?

I don't know what this means. I'm just getting a feel for things, but I'm still accessible. Keep up with me.

Please?

B

Thought for the Day 7/9

Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.

Martin Luther King Jr.

Sounds like a Lupe punch Line.

Right?
B

If One Drop of Black Blood Makes You Black, Like They Say...

Came across this while browsing Tatyana Fazlalizadeh's website.
It's Uh-mazing.

Immediately made me think of Smokey Robinson's poem about being a "Black American". I'm sure I've posted it before, but I'm not sure that you've seen it. His poem begins at 0:40 sec.

Get free.


Intrigued,
B

Thought for the Night

"Forgiveness is the release of all hope for a better past."

Forward to 2:00 if you're disinterested in the caveat.
(or just don't know what he's talking about, like me-

I know what it's like to lose minutes you can't get back,

I'm taking summer classes)

He Speaks My Life,
B

PS About the Books

I also made a point to update the "Currently Reading" portion of this blog. I really haven't been submerged into a book for sometime now. I had tried to read Native Son, but didn't get past the first page. I started reading the story of Elaine Brown. She was the leader of The Black Panther Party... as if I need another reason to be militant. The book is definitely interesting.

I plan on doing some unpacking today than spending some time soaking in the tub and reading more. I left the "Just Finished" book from ages ago, because I don't think I've honestly read another book for leisure purposes in its entirety since that one. What a shame.

All is well though. The summer's back. That portion of this blog will be changing with a lot more frequency. Native Son will probably be next, actually. I've heard great things about it. I just can't drop Elaine Brown mid-story though. K, I'm done for real this time.

Again, don't forget to remind me about Bowing Out Gracefully. Matter fact, remind me about that and Build or Destroy. They go hand and hand kind of.

Alright. Alright.

Fin,

B

That Damn Thing Called Pride

I woke up to a text message that didn't sit well with me... so much so that I immediately got up to blog. When was the last time that happened?

I couldn't even tell you. Either way, today has just thrown a bunch of curve balls at me and something else took priority to that post. However, that something else lead to another necessary post. Still, remind me to later write about "Bowing Out Gracefully". That will be the title of the future post.

Back on topic, I've already established that I'm going abroad next semester. What I may or may not have established is the drastic expense involved in this endeavor... along with the paper work, preparation, etc.

Needless to say, I'm stressed. Life is definitely trying to win right now, but I can't have that.

"Even in defeat, there's a valuable lesson learned, so it evens it out for me".

That's the thought for the day, by the way. Legit though. I'm trying to be short about this, but I should probably give some details. In my shortest yet elaborate explanation I'll say that my dad put money in my account to pay for a summer course I need in order to go abroad in the fall and still be able to gradate upon my return in the spring.

However, I (with my irresponsible self) had over drafted the account so the $2200+ he deposited was being chomped at with charges for former insufficient funds. Now the chomping didn't extend $100, but it still occurred.

More so, that was not my first time over drafting :deep sigh: Me admitting this to the world, shamefully (might I add), is just another part of growth though. I have another account on campus, because my bank back home is only local. That account is fine and in order, but for some reason I let the one that my dad monitors get messy.

Not to say that if was going to messy'fy an account, it should be the one he couldn't see-but geesh luis. C'mon self. Anywho, I realized that I habitually log online and check my bank statement. More so, I check the balance before making any purchases. So, the over drafting had me completely baffled. Not to mention, my dad isn't the person you speak to without having all yours ducks in a row-so I didn't mention it until I figured out what went wrong.

... well, I never figured out what went wrong. However, what was brought to my attention today though is that I only check the balance. I don't check to see from where the withdrawals are occurring. Thus, I never really know if it's up to date. How foolish.

So, I'm defending [insert:pleading] my case with my mother and honestly thinking it was valid til' she pointed out that one little tid bit. I can be so absent minded. Why would it never occur to me to check for something other than the balance? Yes, I'm still a tad green behind the ears.

Now reaching this realization with my mother wasn't the big wig. I had been through the tears portion of our convo, the frustration, the shutting up and just agreeing with everything she says.. all of it. The big deal was calling my father to admit fault. Burrrrr!

Now my mother will hold a grudge, but my father will claim forgiveness then repeatedly remind you of past actions. I've come to realize that I prefer the former. Least it's real. More so, my dad can get under my skin in a way that no body else can, and I'm already sensitive. Double fail.

So, I hang up with her.. call him.. he doesn't answer.. and I secretly have a party in my head. I called. He didn't answer. Not my fault.

But of course, with God's sense of humor and my dad's knowledge that I'd have to admit fault in order for him to put the money back into my account in order for me to confirm my class (did I mention he withdrew the money for my summer classes after seeing my account wasn't in order? Yeah. Add that to the story.) -he called back.

Woosah. So I apologized and admitted to being careless. It was a little winded and roundabout, but I did it. It wasn't as painful as I thought it would be, but it surely wasn't painless. He downplayed it at first, changed the topic and shared some laughs, then came back to rehash his point at the end of the convo. What a man. Love that guy.

Seriously though. It's one thing to acknowledge fault to yourself. It's something else to admit it to someone esle. It's a part of growing up though. Pride aint got many folks much places, I'm just sayin'. And in turn, I learned something about banks. That's what mistakes are for right? Lessons.

I actually wrote a WHOLE poem two nights ago. I emphasize whole because I haven't completed a poem for some time now. Part of it says, "I'm making a point of not making the same mistake twice from this point forward, so at the least I'll be less redundant." Let's see how that goes.

A Work in Progress,

B

The Nerve of Me.

"Yeah. I took a hiatus. I ain't gonna lie." Word to http://semi-literate.blogspot.com/.

I could give you some excuse, but my only one is life. I've been living it man. In whatever capacity. Either way, hey ya'll!

There is much to be updated on. The fro is completely gone. I went to VA Beach to see my nephew again. Still haven't uploaded pics from South Dakota. This silly girl tried me-I entertained her-hind sight told me I should've left it be. I got stranded in Delaware during a pseudo-tsunami with an insufficient windshield wiper.

WAIT!

Did I mention in any time as of late that I got accepted into the Semester at Sea program? I'll officially be on a boat :correction: ship, next semester. Granted, that fact alone may have me more stressed than finals. I need a passport. A visa. Money. Money. And more of the last two items. You don't know the half. If you want to donate, let me know. I'll set a Paypal account up for the cause. It's a real one. Trust me.

Moreso, I've been working on some new pieces. Nothing has completed itself, but they're still existent. I went to Charlotte for the weekend. Spent about a day in Atlanta as well. Might be going to visit someone this weekend, but it's a surprise and if there's any chance they read this I don't want to ruin it.

Uh.. what else? (flipping through planner to see what events have passed besides menstrual cycles, sorry folks-I'm not prego LOL) Oh, yeah-I put in my official two weeks resignation at the place I live/work at. So over that job. Not to mention my favorite boss' last day in the office was today. I told her, in spite of my two weeks notice, if today is her last day-it's mine as well. Moving out in two weeks, still waiting on the word from my fam in Philly as to whether or not I can stay with them this summer.

Summer plans: taking a summer journalism course mandatory to go abroad and still graduate on time upon my return. HOPEFULLY (*pray for me) interning with a law firm in the city... still waiting on word from them, so my financial aid is all messed up.

Ok, I got an appointment booked out of nowhere, but I owe ya'll this update (and then some) so I'll end/post this abruptly. I should've mentioned that I was at work.

Bye!
B

Motivation

That's Just Fine With Me,
B

Thought for the Day 4/12

"Fear knocked at the door and faith answered. No one was there."
English Proverb

I Love That,
B

Thought for the Day 4/7

"If the past cannot prevent you from being present now, what power does it have?"

-Eckhart Tolle

*shoutout to Rhythym, since I wouldn't have fallen upon this gem had she not tweeted it.

It's Everything,
B

Thought for the Day 3/30

"if i can't do
what i want to do
then my job is to not
do what i don't want
to do

..when i can't express
what i really feel
i practice feeling
what i can express
and none of it is equal
i know" (nikki giovanni)

Did I mention that my poetry collective (Babel!) opened for her two weeks ago?
Yup.

We Did That,
B

I'm an Aunty (x3)

Born to my brother, his name is Braylon Anthony Edwards.
I adore him.
Early.
The second nephew in the last 3 months.
Call me Butter, baby- cause I am on a roll.

Well, my siblings are on a roll.

This little man was born on Wednesday, March 17th, and I spent the weekend in Virginia Beach just loving his face and smelling his baby feet.

It's the only time any human odor is precious.

See?

To be an Aunt is to be a Good Thing,
B

PS Speaking of which, I still need to post info/pics of the time I spent in SD with my niece and sister. That's a bit more in depth though.

A Poem for Corey

Here's the poem I mentioned in my post of pictures that I hadn't actually put on the blog. I performed it during Babel's show.

His body is reminiscent of where a man could've been

A brown paper bag full of bones

Reflected on smoky mirrors

He is life altering decisions made last minute and in reverse

His tongue

In deep refusal to become familiar with the taste of weakness

Admits to knowing no fault

No frailty

No room for regrets

He will never admit to being broken

Instead, he’ll call

Speaking in a tone as limp as the branches that sway from willow trees

Equipped with a decade’s worth of insecurities

And burdens just as heavy

As if a bent back were his birth right

And I will rush to his aid

Lose my sense of discretion in sake of his defense

Distribute the weight of his demolished dreams amongst us

And pray to God that the creek don’t rise

You’ll have to pardon me

But I cannot fail him

See, our blood be thick

And all he has to depend on

When his arrogant attitude just sounds like a cry for help

And it seems that no one else can hear,

What in my ears, is painfully obvious

He is just angry

In search of answers only God could grant him

And self-imposed isolation has become his greatest survival tactic

But it’s only a successful method if you let it be

Won’t you choose something else for once

I know it’s not fun

Not the first charitable event that you’d eagerly list on a resume

But you have the power to save a life today

To see the beauty in his rage

And forgive him for it

Though he will never offer an apology

It’s okay to hold him accountable for his actions

But help steer him into making good ones

I can’t be our mother

Can only provide so much comfort

Before I’m forced to remember that I am just his younger sister

Closest of kin

And I can’t be a man for him

But here is my plea

Think of the man he still has the chance to be

Before counting him off as a lost cause

And offering a dank, dark space
Encased by metal bars as his home

Consider this poem

Look up to the sky

Steal the North star

And offer it to him as the guiding light he’ll need to walk in the right direction

It’s the most humane crime you could ever commit

I promise I’ll convince him to keep it in his back pocket should he give you any lip

And he probably will

In that brown bag body of a boy still searching for something to call his own

I wrote him this poem

In hopes that at his next life altering decision

You might find a little time and patience to spare

If not, the heart, to offer him redemption

Smile For Me,

B

You Might Die: Thought for the Day 4/9

"I was angry with you until it occurred to me that you might die."

William Ball

A month ago, when I was first going to post this thought, I had this long elaborte post that accompanied it. It wasn't completed though, and I have since decided not to complete it. Why? IDK, just don't have the sentiments sitting as heavy on my heart as they were when I first wrote this.

But can I kick it? Of course I can.
That's always my precursor to a blunt statement.

I thought of Chris when reading this. He knows who he is. Dependent on if you are an active force in my life, you may know him as well. I'm not sure why it reminded me of him, because I didn't think I was mad at him anymore.

Either way, he came to mind. And I say this to say that I hope you are doing well sir. And being good to yourself. Praying for continued growth.

Simple and Plain,
B

My Life in Pictures

Haven't done this in a while... a long while. So here are a few photographs of my life since I've been missing. Which basically dates back to last year. (In saving pics, I realized I didn't announce the birth of my nephew- EPIC fail).

Either way, I'll keep it simple. Pictures and captions. Nothing more (or less [assuming you care to see this in the first place LOL]). I was going to put them in ascending chronological order (too many big words beside each other-from the furthest date to the nearest), but I'm currently in a terrible mood- I started writing this when I had the patience to do so- and yeah... just blah.

Since (which was 2 days ago), my mood has been fixed. Here we go (and yes, they're in order):


[Went to NC over Christmas break and did some hair chopping. Ya'll know I can't keep a do long. Say hello to my new bangs]


[This would be the newest addition to our bloodline (my nephew). World, meet Romello. Romello, meet the world.]


[Upon my return to school, I made dinner for my coworkers. My boss brought a chocolate cake. I couldn't tell you how it tasted, because cake isn't really my thing. The meal: fried chicken, Spanish rice, asparagus and corn bread. That corn bread is the corn bread that broke the glass dish I use for baking. I'm not still bitter about it or anything-I'm just sayin.]


[Snow. Plain and simple. That's just showing how high it was once they shoveled the sidewalk.]


[More snow. Disrespecting Grace (that's the name of my car, FYI). Shoutout to Jelani for digging her out of it.]


[These ladies would be my "5". Us 5 together, in the club, is pure trouble. Focus on the front two though: they're the newest addition to the group of people I call friends. And ya'll know I don't use the term loosely. Love them. Early.]


[The "Rules of Recess". Recess is a club we went to down in Olde City. Cute little theme dontcha think?]


[Dinner with my boo Andisha during restaurant week. We ate at a steak house (Butcher and Singer). Food was delish. That's my Wendy Williams"How you doin'?" face.]


[Remember Babel had a show back in February? Here we are. At the show. Loving each other. It's okay if you're jealous.]


[Brendan, Malcolm and I during our portion of the show.]


[Me. Doing me. I need to post this new poem, btw.]


[More snow in Philly. Mother Nature was relentless. She's basically a boss and wanted us all to know that it could be winter whenever She wanted it to be.]


[Self-explanatory. It's a snow penis. No, I don't know who made it, but it was outside my building and picture worthy.]


[Sledding down the Philadelphia Art Museum steps. They were covered in ice. That was our bootleg, yet very efficient, sled.]


[One of the best purchases my father ever made for me-not including Grace or the years he had to pay tuition, post full scholarship.]


[New tattoo. And this is a bad picture from when I first got it/I'm too lazy to retake one. It reads: "Fear is only a verb if you let it be". It was inspired by this poem/woman/video.]


[I already told you this, but so what-I cut my hair. It fits in the time line.]


[Some man on my block speaking in a bull horn telling everyone that white people are crazy crackers, Haitians/Puerto Ricans/a lot of other minorities aren't mentioned in the Bible, and Christianity will lead me to hell. Sound like nonsense to you too? Good. Not to mention he's delivering all this looking like a ninja accompanied by a Black Panther gone wrong. I'm just not built for this mess. Excuse me for this long caption, but I just had to.]


[My Thaozy cutie face (roomie from last year, remember?). Don't see her often anymore cause she left school, so her presence is always golden. Can't you tell?]

There are actually more pictures to come. I mean, I did spend spring break in South Dakota. Most of them will include random facets of nature, but they're just as (if not more) wonderful.

Stay Tuned,
B

I'm Not Going Back

Who knows why the title of this post is what it is.

Beyond the fact that I was looking at the title of the last 3 things I didn't post ("More Nerve Than Sense", "I Didn't Lie to You. Honest.", "Women's History Month") and became nostalgic. Why? Because I didn't put much in them beyond the title, so I don't know what I was going to write about... somehow, that though lead to a song by Nas.

Guess what Queen I'm going to see today?

Nope.
Why would I do that?
Not hardly.
That's got potential.

Ok. Give up. My sister.

Yuuuuup! (said like Trey Songz) I don't know what to do with myself... besides pack, of course. Indeed, I have not packed a thing. However, I don't get off til' 1. My suitcase is in my friends basement. It matters not that I was with her last night and at her house for a couple hours. Nor is it important that my plane leaves at 2:40. You know what? You're right. I'm way illy for this entire operation.

Nonetheless, it will go as planned and without a glitch. I have spoken it into life. And so it is. (Damn, I sound like my grandmother)

I missed ya'll man. You know that friend you don't see or speak with often, but when you see them you realize how affected you've been by their absence? Yeah. That's what typing this post feels like.

I think I could legit make a post about how it feels to return, but I'll spare you. As for now, know that I'm going to see my sissy. I'm way excited. My niece doesn't know I'm coming. That makes the "surprise" even better.
WAIT!

Did I mention that South Dakota is my destination? Hehehe, I'm sure that changes some people's perspective. For a minute ya'll were like: "Spring break. With the sister. Woohoooo... South Dakota? (disappointed face)" [end scene]

I won't front. I felt the same way in part. Not to mention, the weather just started clearing up here in Philly (definitely slept in the park for 2hrs earlier this week).

... and it's got the nerve to be snowing in South Dakota. That would ruin most spring breaks for some people. But hey, who else will be able to say they saw Mt. Rushmore this week? Granted, who else can say they wanted to?

I'm playing. I [legitimately] can't stand when my sister's family get's stationed somewhere I haven't visited (they're a military family, hence the randomness of South Dakota), her referencing being in that place, and me not knowing what it looks like. If she says, "Girl, I'm in in bed" [because "girl" would come first LOL], I'd like to have a clear image of what her bedroom looks like. That may sound creepy, but it's howww I feeeeell. (said like this--> meaning the way Santana says it in the song posted below)

IDK why I'm doing so many song references today. It just feels right. Anywho, I'm going to run to my friends and pick up my suitcase. Mind you, I'm at work now. Love my boss man. It's 11:48. I'll be seeing one of my favorite ladies in less than 12 hours. Yes, I leave at 2:40, but I don't arrive in SD until 10.

And yes, I've been writing this post while at work for 2 hours. Hmph.

It Be Like That,
B

Gotta Keep Em' Guessing

Don't be mad at them when it's onto the next one.

So, yuh.
I have been gone.

But I have not forsaken you.
Cut my hair yesterday,
and wouldn't dare do that without informing you.

See?

Just when you thought you had the fro' figured out.

If Mary Should Drop My Baby Girl Tonight-
I Would Name Her Rock n' Roll,
B

Thought for the Day

"You are the person who has to decide.
Whether you'll do it or toss it aside;
You are the person who makes up your mind.
Whether you'll lead or will linger behind.
Whether you'll try for the goal that's afar.
Or just be contented to stay where you are."

(Edgar A. Guest)

Make the Right Decision,
B

Disclaimer

"Player's fuck up."

[fast forward to 2:30 if you don't know the reference]

I know what I said in my last post.

And I meant it.

Time just didn't seem to care.

I made attempts.

I'll elaborate later.

As for now, I have an 8AM class in 6hours.

I'd make another promise,

but they probably don't mean much.

Still, I'll be regaining your trust soon.

Believe That,
B

PS: Learn to look on the bright side of things. If you can't find me, it's not due to a lack of material-it's because I'm busy handling business. Yessuh.

It's Only Right

I've neglected you.
A thousand times over.
Hell, I've even lost a follower.

And this isn't even Twitter!
Nonetheless,
I couldn't stand you up on the day of love.
(Even if it seems to be a hoax presented as a holiday, hehe)

This song/video is what I'll leave you with.
Andre's verse and this video concept just does it for me, everytime.
So here's a song and a promise to return (at least) 3x's this week.

Truce?


I Apologize if [My Disappearance] Gets You Down,
B

Singing Like Raphael Saadiq

"You should be hereeee.." (tonight)

The feature performer is my and my crew. How could you deny us?

PhilaLIVE - Babel Promo from Konnoisseur Creative Group on Vimeo.

Can't Wait to See You!
B

p.s. Did you remember to go vote for my boy [correction: man] Jadon Woodard today? Do that.

Thought(s) for the Day 1/30

I came across both of these while checking my email and couldn't pick which I liked more... so, you get both :)

"I'm not afraid of storms, for I'm learning how to sail my ship."
Louisa May Alcott

"Nothing but heaven itself is better than a friend who is really a friend."
Plautus

Sailor and Friend,
B

Do Me a Favor?

I know I've been M.I.A. for sometime now, and it's a tad improper for me to go missing them pop up all willie nillie and asking for favors...

but...

Could you please go to this link, and vote for Jadon Woodard. Better yet, if time is on your side: watch all the videos and choose your favorite, honestly. I'm almost positive that all roads will lead back to him. But if you just trust my opinion and don't feel the need to view the others, here's what you're voting for:

Yes, you may have seen him on one of Sprite's Slam Dunk Contest commercials. I'm just saying, my boy is doing it. One more thing, if you remember to do this same act, everyday, until February 5th you'd make my heart smile in a major way.

I Appreciate You,
B

Thought for the Evening 1/21

"Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it."
- Mark Twain

Need That,
B

Thought for the (First)Day(of Classes) 1/19

"Attack life, it's going to kill you anyway."
Stephen Coallier

So True,
B

Life Has A Funny Way of Sneaking Up On You

Something always brings me back here.
One way or another.
It's been a while.
But, here I am.

So, the theme song to this post is Ironic by Alanis Morisette.

:Proceeding:

I get a phone call from my grandmother saying that my brother got into an altercation with the soon to be mother of his child, left the house, and told my gram to tell me that he loves me. Upon this not so fun fact, I go back and forth between calling my grandma, my brother, and my dad.

Now, the details of their altercation have lost importance in lieu of the light bulb that just flashed in my head.

First off, upon dealing with this (if that's even what I did), I go looking for comfort. There are people I want to call, but I really just want an in-the-flesh hug. And right now, there's about one person I could call for that in Philadelphia and get a guaranteed response. Nonetheless, they don't stay all that close, and I just told them today that I don't want to be there crutch. Hence, I need not make them mine.

With that being said, I then go to another source.. not the source I would typically/ever go to... but because I am just in need of a hug and company, I figure they will have to do. I hit them up expecting them to not be awake, but they were up-just not close.

And that's probably best cause that probably wouldn't have been the type of comfort I was seeking. Either way, I tell myself to just go write. Duh. And here yall are... here I am. Talking to everyone, no one, and myself all at once.

And it's funny that my older brother is what brought me here, because I've been meaning to write about my experience (while back home) with my younger sisters for sometime now. Now, isn't that time, but I'm just saying.

As it relates to my brother though, he was in the wrong. My grandma, being the saint that she is, has no problem pointing this out, wants him to claim fault where it's due, and deal with the consequences like a man. [not-so-random book plug: A Lesson Before Dying by Ernest Gaines]

In a general sense, I can agree with these requests/thoughts. However, that's my brother we're talking about, and though he was at fault-I only want good things for him. Him turning himself in (which is what my grandma [and now I] thinks he should do) might result in not so good things, since he's already on probation with the chances of serving 5years in the event of anymore "trouble".

So no, I don't want him in jail. Yes, I realize he has never learned his lesson regarding the law, because he always walked off scotch free (with the exception of his not so clear record), but I just don't want that life for him. We actually got in an argument, and he hung up on me about 3 times. Such is life.

I love how my grandma can see the right no matter what though. I'm a Libra. We're all for balance. I should embody that. Guess I'm still wet behind the ears. It just kind of checked me though, because earlier today I was telling someone that I felt like I was in a good place for the most part.

I didn't have any obligations that I didn't opt to be a part of. I wasn't lying to anyone or caught up lying to myself. I'm somewhat happy with my academic career and where it's going. I feel purpose driven even when my path looks hazy, etc. Then this happens.

And though this wasn't hardly about me, it just reminded me that I still have some growing up to do. It was like life saying, "Oh, so you think you're at a good place? You still can't choose right from wrong." And here I am, waving my white flag, saying "Touche." to life. It's crazy.

Granted, I still want what I want for my brother. And I can't say that I'm not completely pissed (and that's an understatement) with his babies mother for how she chose to handle this, but I also can't say that if she was my sister I wouldn't have instructed her to do the very thing she did and then some.

Blood is thicker than water, but right should always prevail over wrong. It's just the law of the land. At least it should be. Even when I don't like it. Note to self.

That's All,
B

I'll leave ya'll with a little melody.
It could be worse, right?


Did I mention I have work at 8AM, and it's the first day of classes? Yup. Isn't it ironic? "Have to laugh out of frustration."

:)

[while posting/proof reading this I realized that this song by Goapele always puts me in the right place. Woosah.]

Appreciate Greatness

You Just Got To,
B

Another Old Post

[I'm clearing out my drafts, and this is from September of 2008. I posted it so who knows why it's in drafts, but there's no harm in seeing it twice if it was from 2yrs ago, right? Right.]

True Indeed,
B

:)

✞ Attack at a Church in Egypt Kills 7

Monika (looks at post below) told me about this. Read the article by clicking on "this".

"Retaliation for a Muslim man raping a Christian girl?"

Rape is bigger than religion & religion should be bigger than murder. I guess the operative word is SHOULD.

Poets feel too much as is. This is something else, man.

We ALL Gotta Do Better,
B

More Conversations W/ Mon, Sitcome Series #3.2434,533

MONIKA: haha i had a dream u were in it

sooo i never have dreams!

we were CIA aagents at a ball all dressed up (the same haha)

ME: lmAO

whose we?

?

MONIKA: and we were hiding from terrorists but we failed bc we couldnt shutup/ our hair would fit anywere because it was always too big

so they found us

me and you haha

then i woke up

soo uhh just thought id share

haha

ME: lmao are you kidding me? hilarity

MONIKA: no the night before that

i had a dream that kelly [readers note: kelly is black] had an asian kid but neglected it

so i had to take care of it

i thnk its finals delerium

ME: lmao definitely is it

granted, youre usually delirious anyway

MONIKA: i cant believe i wasted a dream on kelly

ME: lmao a wasted dream? exactly.

MONIKA: haha

where v u been

its like i needed to have dream bc i never see you

so its kinda ur fault...

ME: lmao way to blame my greatness for your illusions

MONIKA: hahahaha

ME: ive been hiding. really ive been in my rm, up at ridiculous hours thinking about work-not doing-oversleeping-and than repeating the process. today that changes though.

i feel like i just gave a really inspirational speech lol and all the people are clapping while i stand on the podium and my voice vibrates from the speakers

MONIKA: today? u mean tonight

ME: right now. u meant what i knew!

MONIKA: LMAO

ur delerious too

iv been a hermit in my room too

i turned on my christmas lights bc it statted feeling like jail

[this picture was taken at work with my Egyptian princess Monika LOL clearly we were bored, but hey- when in Rome, you do what Romans do]

Meant to Post This A Month Ago,
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Thought for the Day 1/5

“The pessimist complains about the wind. The optimist expects it to change. The leader adjusts the sails.”
John Maxwell

I Aint the Captain of the Yacht
But I'm on the Boat,
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This Woman & Her Poetry Has Changed My Life.

And this isn't even her best work, it's just moved to get to writing.

"..Fear is only a verb if you let it be, don't you dare let go of my hand."

I Need to Write,
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Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

This should have been the thought of the day on NYE. However, I'm just getting this dropped into my lap. Here you have it:

"We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day."
-Edith Lovejoy Pierce

I Deserve This Shit,
[currently listening to Drake's The Winner, which is where that line's from]
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P.S. Random/thoughtful things make my heart smile.

For example?
This.

Sorry, Shanee Renee but it was the only way I could gaurantee being able to view it for ever ever and years to come. Who knows when's the next time I'll need a sure reason to do this--> :)

Thought for the Day 1/2/2010

[putting the "2010" in the date of this post just seemed necessary]

"Our destiny as a people rests not in our stars but in ourselves... I am neither optimist nor pessimist. I am a possibilist."
Max Lerner

Doing Some Reading,
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